Were you aware that napolean's penis was preserved upon his death. Someone somewhere is even now staring at Napolean's penis in a jar on their desk and contemplating the wonders of this life here on this strange planet. I find this very reassuring.
I am currently working on a project to meet payment card industry security standards. It is consuming much of my time. If you know what I do for a living you might find the following question quite humorous: Are there multiple physical security controls (such as badges, escorts, or mantraps) in place that would prevent unauthorized individuals from gaining access to the facility?
UAT TELEMARKETER: OK. Eugene, did you press 1 to oppose same sex marriages?
MIRMAN: Oh, I pressed it, yes.
UAT: OK, that's great to hear. Now are you against same-sex marriages?
MIRMAN:: Well I want to destroy it, yes.
UAT: OK, that's great to hear. And Eugene -
MIRMAN: With the fist of God, we will smash them!
UAT: Exactly. Uh, Mr. Mirman, our organization is dedicated to people such as yourself who want to stop same-sex marriages and to quit doing business with companies that promote and profit from the homosexual lifestyle.
MIRMAN: Some companies profit from homosexuality?
UAT: That's correct.
MIRMAN: By selling sex favors?
UAT: No. Such as AT&T, what they do …
MIRMAN: AT&T sells sex favors?
UAT: No, no. What it is is they own the Hot Network, which is a hardcore pornography channel … They also give millions of dollars to the Gay and Lesbian Alliance group....
MIRMAN: So what about the others? What does Verizon do?
UAT: OK, Verizon. What they do is they train their employees to accept a gay and lesbian lifestyle.
MIRMAN: They try to turn their employees gay?!
UAT: No, no. They train their employees to accept it.
UAT: UAT, Mr. Mirman, is the only carrier that is taking an active stand against same-sex marriages and hardcore child pornography.
MIRMAN: I think all child pornography is hardcore … It's all wrong. AT&T sponsors child pornography?
UAT: No, no. That's MCI.
MIRMAN: MCI sponsors hardcore child pornography?
UAT: Yes, they have a pedophile Web site for men who love boys. Uh, it's a Montreal-based Web site.
MIRMAN: Oh my God! Our Canadian pervert neighbors!
UAT: Mmm hmm.
MIRMAN: So MCI basically has a child pornography ring.
UAT: That's correct....
MIRMAN: Basically God hates AT&T, MCI, and Verizon.
UAT: (pause) Yes. And, Mr. Mirman, do you make a lot of long distance calls or just a few every month?
that moment when the tv oprah profile cascades in color down the dieing screen holds me transfixed as some apogee of modern life as though i too were a tv profile some silhouette as victim as uncle/leper/ then oprah hears the stories to change your life she hears the stories down the dieingin screen.
yea that's the moment. when you look down at the street when noone's around do be careful be unwound. when you walk down the block look in the windows watch the street the girl the glorious girl gift to see the girl down the block look in the windows watch the girl.